Pep Squad

Pep Squad: 1998


High school movies are a great American staple. Most memorable movie moments are high school movies, like quoting dialogue from Clueless or Phoebe Cates showing her tits in Fast Times at Richmond High. These movies take us back to experiences we didn't have but are fun to watch anyway. The two types of high school movies that work are the sex themed or black comedies. A morbid yet comedic look into high school is always entertaining, like Heathers, making light of suicide and school violence or Jawbreaker making accidentally murdering your best friend seem hilarious. Pep Squad is the latest Troma release and it's completely fucked up in all the right ways.

In small town Kansas, prom season is in full swing and all the senior girls want the crown, but some girls want it more than others. Mega bitch Cherry is that one girl who desperately wants to be prom queen but doesn't get the nomination. So she does what every rational teenage girl does, kills off the competition. Meanwhile Beth and her two new friends Julie and Scott accidentally kill the principal and try their best to hide it. Proms can bring out the worst in everybody.

Pep Squad was a really entertaining movie to watch. Ignore the bad acting and just enjoy the morbid campiness. There were many camp things to enjoy like character Terras horrible fashion (white lipstick...all im saying) and the stylized murder scenes. Cherry makes the movie because her quest for prom queen is absurd yet works for this movie. Its funny how she kills off the competition and doesn't do it secretly, she does it point blank and thats pretty badass. What took me by surprise was a school shooting scene that for its time, 1998, may have seemed shocking but worked, as sick as that may sound. The ending scene with Cherry was really wonderful, I'm not going to give anything away I'm just saying it was fantastic.

If you wish your high school memories consisted of rampant murder and cover ups then Pep Squad is the film for you. Every decade needs a fucked up high school film. The 1980s had the brilliant Heathers and the 1990s belong to this movie. The 2000s lacked with morbid high school movies but did supply us with lots of sexy ones (and High School Musical, but that doesn't count because its terrible). Pep Squad will be a must watch when it comes out in May.

Grease 2

Grease 2: 1982

I'm going on record now saying that I really hate "Grease". For some reason I just can't get into it and to this day I don't know why. Now Grease 2 on the other hand, I really like and yet many other people seem to hate it. Whats to hate about this sequel? It shares the same horrible moral as the original, takes place in a school where the kids look like they are in their 30's and are constantly singing, and a time period where there was no such thing as minorities. So why all the hate?

Grease 2 is the simple story of Pink Lady Stephanie who has grown out of her life as a gang member and seeks new excitement. English exchange student Michael comes to this hip school and tries to take in what 1960s America has to offer, and from what Michael sees its biker gangs and everybody singing any chance they get. Michael falls in love with Stephanie but Stephanie wants one thing from a man, and thats a Cool Rider. So in a series of musical events Michael becomes a mysterious motorcyclist that leaves these out of control teens to ask Whos that Guy?. Towards the end Michael is revealed, Stephanie loves him now because he changed for her and everyone sings away any chance of having real careers.

The one thing to really dislike about this movie is the same tired moral they used in the first movie, and thats if you want that girl and/or guy to love you you need to change to his preference. So if your lady wants a dangerous bike rider but your more focused on a life in a real job supporting yourself you better get rid of that foolish dream and learn to ride a motorcycle. That tired moral made the first movie a huge success so why not strike that mine twice.

Now on to the awesomeness....the music was so much better, don't act like you don't enjoy Cool Rider because it's a catchy song. I cant go on a ladder without reenacting that scene sad as it may be. The camp factor of this movie was wonderful, especially the end where Stephanie thinks Michael is dead so she has this vision where hes in a gold motorcycle suit and its all white.



Also bask in the fact that most of the songs are about fucking. How many musicals do you know that managed to make innocent songs about fucking? A song about bowling thats about fucking....A song about going to war and fucking....A song teaching sex education leading to fucking, its all here in one convenient musical. Celebrate Grease 2 for its campiness, its 1980s trying to be 1960s music style, its bad acting and for the fact it killed any hope of more 'Grease' sequels.

Grace

Grace: 2009

Modern horror is a hit and a miss. What seems to be popular is remakes of classics we used to love, but these remakes are really fucking terrible. Classics like Halloween, Friday the 13th, Last house on the left and many others destroyed by mainstream Hollywood. Todays generation doesn't deserve the past, they deserve their own brand of films. The problem with that is todays entertainment kinda took a turn for the worst, making celebrities out of reality tv to internet people and the heavy use of CGI which makes movies lazier. You can see that when a new horror movie comes out thats not a remake it's really gotta struggle to get its praise. 2009s Grace is not only hard to watch but it's a beautiful film on ones women struggle of motherhood.

Meet Madeline, a hip vegan women who is pregnant and desperately wants this baby. Madeline wants to have this child with a midwife (with who I think had a lesbian affair with in college) but her mother-in-law refuses it because shes a WASP cunt. When Madeline gets in a car accident leaving her husband and unborn child dead she looses her mind and decides to carry the baby to term. When the time comes to deliver Madeline lays in a hot tub filled with her own blood and her dead child. After willing it back to life Madeline is ecstatic to finally have a child, but every blessing has its burden. This newborn named Grace is attracting flies, shes losing hair and bruising easily, and worst of all shes not eating. Madeline ignores the fact her child is a zombie and lets a series of horrific events happen.

Grace gives the feeling of Rosemary's Baby just without the satanism. Both share similarities in the fact that whats supposed to be the most happiest time in a women's life turns out completely terrible and that despite their children being monsters they still care for them with love. It's a feminists horror film, you watch Madeline being a mother the best she can and her mother-in-law struggle with the death of her son and breast feeding, and you see the mid-wife cope with the fact her lesbian lover is married and comes to the rescue. Women here are seen in an honest light and it doesn't shy away from feminist concepts.

You can achieve an excellent horror movie without heavy amounts of violence and CGI. Granted a violent bloody slasher film is always great but you need a break from them once in a while. The gore was at a minimum and it technically wasn't scary, just uncomfortable to watch. If you're a man who doesn't want his girlfriend to ever get pregnant this is the movie to watch. Love it or hate it Grace is a wonderful film to watch.

Class of Nuke 'Em High

Class of Nuke 'Em High: 1986


When it comes to B-Movie gold you can turn to TROMA for it. Say what you want about their movies but most of them are pretty great. This one in particular is great and for once had pretty decent reviews. Class of Nuke 'Em High is that gem of a film that offers all your basics in a high school film.....a love story, a gang, drug use, sex, violence and a cautionary tale. So sit back and relive your high school days if you lived near nuclear power.

Class of Nuke 'Em High is the story of a high school built near a nuclear power plant. Tromaville is known for its nuclear power and if youve seen enough TROMA films you would know this is a terrible place to live. But the townspeople dont seem to mind the fact that this power plant is screwing up their children, typical American parents. How can a tiny nuclear power plant be messing up this towns teens? Turns out the honor society is now a vicious motorcycle gang. There is also a love story between two typical white blonde hair teens who get high off nuclear marijuana, have crazy sex, hallucinate, turn into monsters for a brief period of time, gives birth to a monster that winds up destroying the school and have things go back to normal...typical high school stuff.

This movie has a plus and a minus, The plus being the honor society. It's a really sweet concept to have the schools brightest students becoming violent and drug selling. Also the costumes were of course awesome 80s style which no one can resist. The minus is the huge plot holes with the honor society. One being that its never explained why and how these teens were turned into a biker gang, And this one teen boy has breast but none of the other gang members have any deformities. But one can ignore the plot holes and enjoy the film for what it is. I applaud the fact that this movie is kind of a cautionary tale, cautionary being dont do drugs and have sex or you will give birth to a monster. And dont build nuclear power plants in small towns because it will fuck up your children and you wont gain profit from it.

A final note being that the theme song and soundtrack is awesomely 80s which as mentioned before no one can resist. Class of Nuke 'Em High is a really good time to watch. If you're looking for a fun movie to watch that has a lot of thought put into it but doesn't seem like it does then this is the right movie for you. It's your typical high school film but better.